One year and six months….natural
The first ten months of me being natural I cut my hair often. I did not want it to grow. I was self-conscious and unsure of how I was going to maintain this hair that I was so unfamiliar with. Short hair just seemed like the easy way to go.
One of my close friends went natural the same time I did and her hair was growing, her curls were “popping”….she looked beautiful. Meanwhile I was still rocking my TWA (Teenie Weenie Afro). People would look at me and I would feel like they were thinking: “she has cut off all her hair and now she’s bald. Her hair ain’t even growing.”
Winter 2010 was my first winter with no hair and it was brutal to not have any hair to protect my head, ears, or neck from the elements. After I considered all those factors listed above i decided January of this year to let my hair grow….this is when my true natural hair journey began.
I cannot stress enough how many times I considered breaking my vow to myself and just whacking all my hair off out of frustration. But I did not give up on my hair or myself. Presently, my hair is the longest it’s been in over a year. It took me some time but I finally found my way and stopped feeling discouraged about how to manage and maintain my hair.
I do not have “good hair.” I have nappy hair. My hair isn’t silky, wavy, or well-defined curls. I have accepted that and embraced it. I will admit I spent many days wishing for “good hair.” I wanted the pretty curls that natural hair black women depicted on TV or in magazines had. It took me a while to accept that the reality is I am not that woman the media depicts. I never will be and this I have accepted. I have accepted myself and my hair…as a result others (family, friends, even total stranger) have followed suit. My nappy hair is beautiful and the moment I realized that I began to find ways to take care of MY hair TYPE.
It was not easy but i am now in a place where I have the perfect hair regimen for myself that allows me to style my hair in ways that leave me feeling fabulous. I can preach all day about how to love your hair for what it is and to stop loving it for what you think it should be but I won’t. It took me one year and six months to get to the level of comfort I am with my hair today…each woman’s journey is different.
-Live with your eyes wide open, S.
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